Good morning. It's Valentine's day. If your married, and missed this fact. Well, it's too late for you. Buy a quilt cause your sleeping outdoors.
I love Valentines Day. Its a great opportunity to be romantic with the one you love. Its a chance to eat chocolate, which for me is always a plus. Although at this rate of chocolate consumption factored with my age, I am cruizin towards plus sized.
Valentines Day is the kiddie ride for the unromantic. The idiot's guide if you will. Everywhere you go, you see opportunities to purchase things to tittilate the senses.
"He Beavis....."
But yes with Amore comes ..... looking for a good word for stupid. Hmmmm? I recall one year I purchased my wife a radio for Valentines Day. This was dumb on so many levels. Lets explore. Walk with me.
First, never buy your wife an appliance unless it has batteries and should be kept hidden. Incidentally don't over do this purchase either, because like so many good science fiction novels, the robots take over the world and man can't "handle" or in this case "compete" with the competition. For those of you slower readers.... The rabbit keeps pounding away to the chorus of "Still Going".
Back to the radio. When I purchased this radio I did so against the advice of an entire "Intro to Sociology Class" I was teaching. I remember this because I was measuring each vote with my own profiles of the students. Even the lonely hearts club in the front row looked skeptical about my purchase. Of course they were right.
I think my best work came when the University I worked at had the Barber Shop quartet going around delivering roses and serenading for charity. JACK-POT. This is easy. Romantic, Spontaneous, Awesome. There is no way I could screw this up. None.
I blew it. For that very same day, while checking her e-mail.......Note to self. Don't go pornographic websites without your wife's consent. "Curse you history bar"
There's a theme here. Technology continues to undo my genius. I feel the Amorous Coyote, never able to catch that delicious Road Runner. Re-read this later and picture the Coyote in the back ground . At certain spots you can actually here the Coyote falling off the cliff. sssssssssssshhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaar POOOOWWWW!!!!. Cloud of dust, next scene.
"Meep Meep" Happy Valentines Day.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
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2 comments:
First, he got out of bed to settle he kids at 7am. An hour later, my husband woke me up by putting earphones in my ears, and setting his iPod to "She's Fantastic" by Sondra Lerchen. He had the lyrics written out on a handmade heart, cut with crimping shears. I'd never heard the song before. Totally vintage-college romancing, here. I loved it.
So, maybe the hot dog toaster wasn't the WORST present in the world... or, at least it may have tied :) I hope this year was better :) I got chocolate a teddy bear, and a charm bracelet... Even if a whole Intro to Sociology class couldn't teach it, a spouse can! Happy 'Singles Awareness Day to all of the unattached!'
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